her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!