No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
Randomize
