remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
he wants to bone in the snuggie
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
We are two peas in an std pod
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
last night I used snow as a chaser
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