dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
Randomize