We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
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