im having a threesome with these popsicles
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
I just got a text from a stranger offering to shave my asshole. I've been sober and out of town for a week, are you using my number as a dial-a-dumping again?
Randomize