Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
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he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
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