he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
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And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
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all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
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