Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
