Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
Randomize