I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*