My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
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