ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
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