I have demons in me.
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
I woke up to three texts telling me to "go fuck myself," a panicked voicemail from my mom, and a girl thanking me... I'm not sure which I should take care of first
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
You tried to tip the Uber driver with a meatball sub. Then, when he refused your meatball sub...you demanded he take you to the corner with the hookers. The valet has your keys and water balloons. I'm glad you're only in Chicago for the weekend.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
Randomize