Where did you get a picture of my penis
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
50% drunk capacity currently
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
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