I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
Mike is offhisass drunk and just sat down next to my sister and said "If you gained 30 pounds and stopped reading poetry, I would be attracted to you. Now, your little sister, attractive, even though she's basically the same person as you- she just pulls it off better because she's 15."
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
Randomize