Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize