OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
These 31 People Are Lazier Than You Could Ever Imagine
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
27 Drunk People That Pissed Off The Cops And Got What They Deserved
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
You know you're getting old when 19 year olds you've met on tinder advise you that you should start looking for a wife and/or the mother of your children
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.