so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
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The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
Moment of the night: you were impatient while I paid for the tequila shots and proceeded to lick and salt MY hand for me. This is why we're roommates.
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
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Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
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