I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
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he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
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He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.