just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
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