idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
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