can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
I just heard a mom tell her toddler son "shut the fuck up. Don't ask me to buy you shit when i'm taking u to go see some fucking animals" welcome to the bronx.
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
Randomize