i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
I love you.
Bad choice
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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