I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
New low: just hacked my moms facebook
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
Randomize