hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
Randomize