There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
smell my finger.
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
Edward fifth and chaser hands
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Randomize