Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
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