yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
got in a fight at the bar because some dude thought i was being sarcastic when i told him "sweet mustache". it really was a sweet mustache
I want to see you every morning in the kitchen ass naykid on roller blades making pancakes.
Stop sending me these texts. This is your mom, not your girlfriend.
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Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
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OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.