Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
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I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.