But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
Randomize
