Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
You've changed since you got that strap on
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
Randomize
