guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
These tits shall not be calmed
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
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