She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
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