my soul wont recognize me after tonight
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
AHHHHHHHHH. I LEFT A GLASS NEXT TO ME WHEN I FELL ASLEEP I'M SO SURE IT WAS WATER BUT NOW IT'S VODKA JESUS MADE A STOP
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
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