I puked a lego.
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
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for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
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Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
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