would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
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