I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
Hurricane my ass. I'm riding a god damn kayak down the flooded highway if it's the last god damn thing I do, god damnit.
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
Randomize