so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
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