He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
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