my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
Everclear isn't food dammit
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
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