I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
Randomize
