Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
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