Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
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I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
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They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
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