I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
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