I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
