this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
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He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
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No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.