Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize
