party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
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He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
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He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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