that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Randomize