Texts From Last Night

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  (618): View more from Illinois

  do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?

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  (618): do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like? http://tfl.nu/izmu
  Replies (28) Good night (584) Bad night (1040)
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  (206): View more from Washington

  i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.

  (425): View more from Washington

  for sure. did you let him do it?

  (206): View more from Washington

  thats not the point.

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  (206): i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship. (425): for sure. did you let him do it? (206): thats not the point. http://tfl.nu/qjrv
  Replies (80) Good night (2479) Bad night (3724)
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  (518): View more from New York

  i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.

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  (518): i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage. http://tfl.nu/gxvx
  Replies (6) Good night (2916) Bad night (895)
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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.

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  (919): I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life. http://tfl.nu/1v5e
  Replies (33) Good night (1129) Bad night (3215)
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs

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  (847): it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs http://tfl.nu/alw1
  Replies (14) Good night (3827) Bad night (703)
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  (540): View more from Virginia

  he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride

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  (540): he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride http://tfl.nu/4fyt
  Replies (34) Good night (20665) Bad night (1755)
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.

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  (203): There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper. http://tfl.nu/r5h8
  Replies (11) Good night (3089) Bad night (1785)
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  (+04): View more from

  She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.

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  (+04): She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf. http://tfl.nu/hr1t
  Replies (7) Good night (1138) Bad night (873)
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  (870): View more from Arkansas

  Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.

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  (870): Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl. http://tfl.nu/m2u6
  Replies (21) Good night (2478) Bad night (648)
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  (502): View more from Kentucky

  Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?

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  (502): Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk? http://tfl.nu/ayp8
  Replies (2) Good night (557) Bad night (1566)
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G

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  (503): I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G http://tfl.nu/pzjk
  Replies (5) Good night (1754) Bad night (526)
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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  When people ask about my bruises, I'm just going to say it was a doorknob. Or possibly a group of doorknobs. Angry doorknobs.

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  (919): When people ask about my bruises, I'm just going to say it was a doorknob. Or possibly a group of doorknobs. Angry doorknobs. http://tfl.nu/7b1r
  Replies (6) Good night (1550) Bad night (568)
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  (309): View more from Illinois

  you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.

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  (309): you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits. http://tfl.nu/xhq2
  Replies (1) Good night (689) Bad night (292)
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  (501): View more from Arkansas

  No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!

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  (501): No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar! http://tfl.nu/p74j
  Replies (1) Good night (480) Bad night (271)
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  (318): View more from Louisiana

  she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper

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  (318): she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper http://tfl.nu/ei3r
  Replies (3) Good night (718) Bad night (259)

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